On April 20th 1990, my Father died suddenly. There have been many more deaths and loss’s since then and, so it surely goes, there will be more to come.
I have always been fascinated by death, which to me, is synonymous with life. Generally I’ve been in an existential funk most of my life but found it hard to find people willing to have those conversations.
I had several ideas of what my project would be – none of which were anything close to what it has refreshingly turned out to be. One idea was a business plan that I had discussed in my interview for the University of Santa Monica. However, I wanted a break from business and I felt it was necessary to do a project in service to my personal growth.
Seeking clarity I was recommended to see Paula Majeski who is on the school faculty – . Paula is an energy worker and artist. I got to her apartment and was immediately wowed by her beautiful artwork. I sat down in her chair and explained that I wasn’t really sure why I was there. Within minutes I was balling my eyes out telling her my life story.
Paula said it was interesting that my father died when I was 9 years old. She said little girls see their Fathers as God until they are 10 years old, then our ‘veil’ lifts and our awareness shifts. She said it is no wonder that I had been ‘seeking’ for God in some way all my life. Paula said, ‘My sense is there is a reclaiming of yourself and healing the part inside that is affected by the loss of your father at 9.’
I left her place thinking, really, I am going to have to grieve for my project?! I felt that I had done a significant amount of grieving since my late 20’s. I was not feeling too happy about the prospect at first and kind of wished my classmates hadn’t suggested I see her!
It didn’t take me long to realize that this was the perfect project for me!
I decided to name the project, ‘Conversations about Death & Grieving.’
I knew there would be people willing to share their heartfelt experiences. Not to mention the fact that 2016 has seen the advent of multiple celebrity deaths. My project about death and grieving came about quite unintentionally but, nonetheless, seems very timely in the wake of the world experiencing the collective loss of some of our pop culture icons.
Each month I will post a new blog under my ‘Deep’ section relating to the topics I have been writing about as part of my project.